Having time to self-reflect can be a great time to attempt something new or looking to create a positive change in your life.

With a lot of us in isolation and social distancing, it’s a perfect time to take a look at some of your old habits. So I wanted to share with you 5 things I’ve been working on giving up recently.

The 5 things below are simple ideas or beliefs that you can quit this week to start making a positive change and long-lasting impact on your life. But what is important to remember, is that you should not be seeking to give up each of these for instant results, instead look to try and improve each of these by just a small amount each day. 

By focussing on what you can do each day, you’ll soon start to recognise the impact the changes are having in the long term.

Overthinking

This is the single biggest creator of stress and anxiety. I’ve spent many of my years overthinking every situation, possible outcome, conversation, etc and you know what I realised? It’s just wasted energy. And not only that, but it is mentally exhausting.

There’s no need to overthink anything. It doesn’t help any situation, it doesn’t cause change and it certainly doesn’t change the outcome.

It’s important to see every situation for what it is, accept it how it is and move on. After all, by overthinking, you might be shutting yourself off to new possibilities of further growth. Free up your mind and step into the present.

Living in the past

Your past does not define you. I repeat, your past does not define you. One of the things I have worked on massively in the past year is freeing myself from all of the past stories and events that I have felt ‘defined’ who I am. Be it a job, a place, a belief or more.

When you realise that these are just stories and that you actually have the power to create the life you want in any given moment, you will free yourself from living in the past.

Stepping into the present is one of the most powerful and impactful things you can do in your life. Live life moment to moment – as it is intended. And stop getting caught up in the stories in your head. Because they are just that; stories. And they are stopping you from living your reality.

Trying to please everyone

We’ve all heard the famous phrase “You can’t please all of the people all of the time” but why is it so hard for us to live by it? Personally, I found it was because I found myself placing my happiness in other people’s opinions, whilst I was neglecting my own. I was seeking validation in pleasing others rather than focussing on what pleased me.

The only person you need to please in your life is you. And yes, that includes your family, partner, friends and even your boss! Because if you can’t live a life where you are pleasing yourself then how can you trust anyone else ever will?

There’s nothing wrong with doing things you want to do, on your own time and in your own way. You are only living your experience of life. You are the main character – so start treating yourself that way.

Negative self-talk

That voice in your head can be your best friend or your worst enemy. But it is also YOUR voice.

You are the one who determines and shapes how it sounds. If you are coming from a negative place then your self-talk will be mean and negative. Whereas if you are coming from a positive place, your self-talk will be positive and friendly.

I used to have a very negative voice in my head, so once I decided that I wanted to create a change, I started focussing on looking for small positives every day. Each time that negative voice popped up, I would look at spinning it into a positive or try to understand the full picture. And slowly, the mean voice disappeared, while the positive one grew and grew.

Fear of change

We live in a society where we are taught security and stability are good things. And to a certain extent they are, but it often means we get stuck down a path we don’t actually want to be down, because it is the ‘safe’ place to be.

Some of the greatest thinkers, creatives and explorers would not exist if they did not push these boundaries. Now, I’m not saying that you should go and sail the seven seas or hike up mount Everest.

But, you should stop looking at change as a bad thing. Recently I shared a post on my instagram about how I see Spring and Autumn as the two most beautiful season of the year, yet they are the two seasons of change and transition. 

Maybe we should all start looking at the change in our lives as something beautiful too.

Peace and love,

Alex